Happiest in 2

I realized something on a run last night with Mr. Fury that is season changing.  I don't want to race anymore.  It's not that I never want to do a triathlon, marathon or road race ever again, but it's that I'm worn out mentally and maybe even physically from trying to become faster.  My workouts and racing have started to feel like a second job that is more stressful than my day job.  I used to love racing because it was fun not because I felt obligated to get a certain time or to place in my age group.  The increase in speed and faster times came from the years of training and my love of the sport, not from frustrating workouts at the track.  I feel like I have lost all sense of fun with racing and I really need to get that back. 

Last night I decided that there will be no attempt at Boston this year.  I'm going to spend as much time as I can in zone 2 because that is truly my happy place.  I made Mr. Fury swear that he would keep reminding me of this and not let me buy a GPS HRM because that will make me focus more on times and paces which is exactly what I don't want to do.  The hope is that by October, I will look back on this season and feel happy that I had fun.  I don't want a repeat of last year when I showed up to Brewhouse angry at the thought of racing and ran TCM thinking: Why the hell am I doing this?  It's hard to put my dream of Boston on the shelf for awhile, but I know it's what I need to do in order to salvage my love of running, triathlon and racing.  Someday I'll get there.  ::sigh::

In other (happier) news, it was my birthday last weekend.  Mr. Fury and I went to my parents' lake home with a group of our friends and my brothers to hang out and have a relaxing weekend.  It was a great time and I'm so glad we decided to celebrate there this year.  It was rainy and chilly most of the weekend, but my brothers and my friend Dave made the most of it by taking the boat out anyway and going water skiing.  Crazy kids...

I love birthdays, and mostly because I'm completely surprised by Mr. Fury and his tremendous memory.  This year he got me some awesome gifts that I had even forgotten that I asked for back..well...let's not say how early I start talking about my birthday, but rest assured, it's pretty darn early in the year.  He got me a wireless keyboard for my computer that I can use when I work at home and super tasty delicious brownies that he ordered from the Vermont Brownie Company.  Oh.My.Gawd.  They are so freaking good.  I tried the Espresso Brownie today and it was unbelievable.  Look at this tasty goodness:

Really, can it get any better than espresso beans inside a brownie?!  You get a chocolate and caffeine high all at the same time!  Genius!  Don't be jealous you didn't think of it first and go order a tasty delicious box of your own.  You don't even have to share unless you want to.  The best, and funniest, part of how I received the brownies was that they came via USPS while we were gone.  The mail dude put the box just inside the door, but the box was too big for the door to shut all the way.  The squirrels tried to bust into the brownies by chewing away at the outside box.  Little did they know that the Vermont Brownie Company is prepared for such rodent initiated box raids, and they package their brownies in a box inside a box.  HA! Take that you filthy animals!  No brownies for you!

Last night the birthday festivities continued when we had a rousing soiree at my parents' house for my younger brother's birthday who turned, brace yourselves, 25 years old.  25 YEARS OLD! I still can't believe it.  I still think he should be 12, and never grow older.  On the bright side, he's still one of the funniest and most smiley-est people I know.  Happy birthday dude, it was an honor to share a massive DQ birthday cake with you last night. 

Cheers!